Tuesday, March 8, 2011

think before you speak, people

I have to return to work in one month. I dread it more and more every day, but since I like having a roof over my head and food to eat I have to do it. Lately people, more specifically women, keep saying things like "have you thought about how hard it's going to be to go back to work" and "I couldn't leave my baby". What is the response they are looking to solicit? I usually just say, "well we have to eat". But seriously, what are they trying to do? Am I supposed to start crying on the spot? Do they think that I wake up each day thinking "only x many more days until I don't have to look at this baby all day"? Are they trying to imply that they somehow would be or were a better mother because they didn't or wouldn't work? I just don't get it. I think as an adult these ladies should know that it is going to be horrible to leave my baby for the first time and that it's not a polite topic to bring up. Just my opinion, what do other moms think?

And an update on the last topic of judgment I posted: sleeping. Last night Jackson slept, in his crib, from 9pm to 4:15 am. I did exactly the same things before bed that I have done every other day, I guess he was just tired. Or maybe he will treat us to the same thing again tonight.


  1. I know it's very difficult but the best thing to do is nod, smile, and go on. In my observation, other mothers can be the most judgmental individuals! I had someone ( a person I would call a close friend) tell me that because i chose not to breast feed that she could already tell I WAS NOT going to have another one! And I'm sure you've encountered similar instances with parenting advice, etc. Anyway, just let it roll off! You're a fantastic mother to little Jackson and as long as you know it and he knows it.....that ALL that matters! :)

  2. Oh sister, I remember those comments. My favorite was, "Can't you find some way to stay at home?" Oh sure, I forgot that we hid $200k in the mattress. Poof, I can stay at home now. I hope that he continues his sleeping jag. Wren is the Vice President in the crap sleepers society. UGH!!!!!!!!

  3. Ugh. I remember those days after Jamie was born. I don't recall it being nearly as bad after Oliver was born; probably because by then I had the good sense to tune out all external sound when other people pretended to act like they knew what was right for my family and spout their unsolicited and batshit crazy views at me.

    You're a great mom, Rheannon. And a smart enough one to know that you've got at least a good three-year-window before Jackson figures out why Mommy is holding her middle finger up at those random women at the supermarket and playgrounds. Just sayin'.

    P.S. Tell Katie I heard that kids who are not breastfed grow up to have different private parts and unhealthy addictions to Fanta pop. They also explode on their thirtieth birthdays and think their mothers were serial killers. LOL

  4. Oh my goodness, Rheannon! I just asked you about going back to work today. Didn't know it was such a touchy subject, I am sorry!

  5. Christine, don't worry. You didn't say it in a mean way. I wasn't offended because you didn't try to imply what a bad mom I am.